Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
