Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
