shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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