I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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