He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
