Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
So I just went to clothing optional bar
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
