worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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