What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
