i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
