i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
