we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
