Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
