i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
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