Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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