Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
