Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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