he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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