so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
