Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
