I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
