So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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