I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize