Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
