once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
