Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
