you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
