she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
