I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize
