Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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