What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
COCAINE IS GR8
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
