I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
You took a bar mat shot.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
