We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
