That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
