That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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