Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
where are you?
Hypothermia
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize