Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I deserve this hangover.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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