im about as happy as oj after his trial
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
