Whoa Z and x make the same sound
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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