everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
