YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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