I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
