sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize