You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
