But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I accidentally had phone sex last night
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
