Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
