So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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