Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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