Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
