with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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