he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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