idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize